Never talk politics with family and friends—or so they say. But as we’ve learned, we must have difficult conversations if we hope to change anything. Sometimes, you’ll be able to prepare for a serious discussion in advance so it goes smoothly.

On the other hand, the topic could arise organically at family dinners, social events, and other informal gatherings—at any time and with no warning. Without talking points and rules of engagement, how do have a productive discussion? What cues do you need to be aware of when responding to a racist family member? And what if it gets heated—to the point where you’re worried your relationship will never be the same?

In this frank conversation, Krysten talks with Dr. Mia Cary about the realities and consequences of impromptu discussions about race and discrimination. Dr. Cary offers advice on why you should speak up, even if you know another person’s point of view won’t change; demonstrates how to tactfully correct someone who is stereotyping; and what to do when disagreements threaten your closest relationships.

This is a must-listen episode for anyone who wants to learn how to better handle difficult conversations. Though the conversation centers around race, Dr. Cary’s techniques can be applied to other personal and professional situations.

Episode Guest